It's been over a year since I've been on LJ. Pity, since it is the place I always felt I was being heard.

I've missed the folks on here and obviously have way too much to catch up on with everyone. I'm sure some people have dumped me as a friend by now. Some of you, I see, are very persistent.

In a nutshell, life is good. Still working in the ER. This pretty much sums up how I feel about that most of the time:
Seriously, I have a great group of people to work with and the ER here is not nearly like the California hellholes I've worked in.

I had another angioplasty in March. My pulmonary artery was not nearly as closed as it was the 2 years before, so i won't have to go back for another three or four years. Read about all that nonsense at . fibrosingmediastinitis.blogspot.com/ if you are so inclined.

My partner and I celebrated seven years together this past October. We celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary in May. Got new rings in Colorado.

My latest project involves working on my first novel. I spend as much time as I can working on that. Anyone having tips hooking me up with a literary agent, let me know. You can read excerpts at Broadspeare.com

I'm sitting in a noisy coffeehouse, wondering why I come to such places thinking I'm going to get anything done.

Truly, I'm aggravated about so many things right now.

My partner and I went to Arizona in January to explore Tucson, Bisbee, and Tombstone. We booked a ghost tour in Bisbee one night. It was led by a guy named Kevin (yes, I'll use his real name because jerks deserve to be exposed). Anyway, the tour was not as intriguing as other ghost tours I've been on, but, Kevin was smitten with my partner, as many men tend to be. I don't mind this, but when they are so blatant about it, I find it annoying, especially when they disregard my presence. My partner is very personable with just about everyone. After the tour, Kevin invited us to the Copper Queen Hotel bar for a drink. We chatted for a while. He told us his entire life story about how he was divorced and how his ex-wife was the worst woman on the face of the earth and he was a victim of her in so many ways. One of the joys of being a nurse is that people feel comfortable telling you about their medical conditions, so we had hear about this guy's prostate function and the fact that he has to get up four or five times during the night to take a piss. For some reason, my partner does not recollect this conversation. She also does not remember him saying, "Even if you girls invited me back to your hotel, I doubt I'd be able to function." Who says this? Ok, gross. Later, we parted ways and Kevin went on and on how "sometimes you just meet people you click with and it becomes a lifelong friendship." Yeah, ok. A few days later, we go home and Kevin "friends" both of us on Facebook. He and my partner chat, email and eventually start chatting on the phone. "Oh, Kevin is such a great guy...blah blah blah." A few days later, I get an email from a friend of mine who I have known since the third grade. Kevin, apparently went through my friends list, looking for single women, saw my friend's Facebook photo and started writing to her. It creeped her out and I called him on it. Oh, he was apologetic. He told me that SHE contacted HIM, and it was all an innocent mistake. Her boob job was not a factor, I swear. Anyway, I pretty much got this jerkwad's number from the outset, but my partner was still not convinced. He somehow explained his assholism away to her and she fell for it. They spent hours on the phone, talking about his pathetic love life, or lack thereof and how he couldn't meet any decent women. "If only you had a twin," he'd tell my partner. How sweet.

"Oh, you just need to spend more time with him," my partner told me. "He's such a nice guy. We have so much in common and have really great talks." Ok, fine. Maybe I misjudged him.

In October she got an email from Kevin, basically inviting himself to our house for Thanksgiving. He buys an airline ticket immediately and sends his itinerary to us. My partner plans this wonderful holiday dinner, takes off work, etc. Then Kevin gets an online girlfriend and he decides he can't tell the new girlfriend that he's coming to Oregon to spend the weekend with a lesbian couple he met on one of his ghost tours. He tells her he's going to a conference. OK, whatever makes you happy. Weeks go by and he doesn't call. My partner leaves several messages to confirm his arrival. No response. On Tuesday night, he's supposed to fly into town. We look at each other and wonder what the hell we're supposed to do. Do we drive to the airport? The asshole doesn't show up, nor does he even have the balls to call and say he's not coming. My partner gives him a chance to redeem himself, but he fails. She emails him for any kind of explanation. He fails to respond. I hate to say "I told you so," but I told you so. Now, she feels like a total idiot for believing anything this guy said. She feels stupid for not seeing through him and for doubting me when I said he was a creep in the first place. The bottom line is, he was interested in my partner, sexually, and she didn't give him what he wanted, so he didn't need her anymore. He finally got it through his fat stupid head that he was not an option for her because, oh-my-god, she's already involved with someone! I feel bad for my partner because she invested time and energy into what she thought was going to be a long friendship. Personally, I'm stunned that someone would be this inconsiderate, but I guess I shouldn't be.

Wednesday, my mom calls me to tell me that my uncle dropped dead while working in the yard and I'm 2800 miles away. I'm in low spirits when we have our Mexican fiesta dinner. The day goes way too long, with too much drinking on the part of our guests. The music is loud and annoying, especially to my partner's 81 year old father, but no one takes that into consideration while blasting Lady GaGa and turning the house into a damn gay bar.

Friday, my car won't start. AGAIN. My computer gets a virus and both of my cameras die. My partner sprains her ankle and is out of commission for the rest of the week because she can't get up and down the stairs. My dog starts getting more neurotic and begins compulsively licking his paw. I have to tend to his emotional needs as well as to the psychological needs of every human in my life.

My cousin sent me this video of Richard Simmons as a guest on Drew Carey's "Whose Line is it Anyway?", an improv show that is hilarious in its own right.

Enjoy and Prepare to wet your pants


Some of the best parts is Drew's reactions.

That's the argument I hear about why we are at war in Iraq.

OK, OK, so Iraq didn't have weapons of mass destruction AND they had nothing to do with 9/11, but we had to overthrow that evil dictator! And we have to bring democracy to their country! Democracy? You mean run their country like we run ours? Perhaps, since we're almost finished with George Bush, we should give him to Iraq so he can show them how a real government should be run. After all, he's done so well here.

Thou hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.--Matthew 7:5

Yes, we're all about overthrowing evil dictators. After all, we got Hitler!
Hitler started persecuting Jews in 1935 when he took away their German citizenship. The Jews in this country were well aware of the atrocities going on with their European families, but they were ignored. This went on for six years before we entered WWII and we only entered it because we declared war on JAPAN, after we were attacked at Pearl Harbor. We only got into the European arena because they declared war on us! But we manage to spin it so we look like heroes in the end.

Which dictator shall we tackle next? Since we are clearly in the business of ridding the world of evil dictators?

What about Kim Jong-Il who runs the most isolated, repressive regime in the world. Citiizens are not allowed to have any information outside of government propaganda. The government has a "guilt by association" rule whereby three generations of family members may be punished for one member's alleged crimes and he has imprisoned roughly 200,000 citizens in labor camps, for arbitrary reasons. They are fed near starvation rations and are tortured and executed for trivial offenses. and the capture, torture and jailing of those who try to flee to China. (oh, wait. we have that too..it's called Guantanamo)
The North Korean government prioritized the diversion of resources and food to assist military and nuclear programs and allowed as many as 1 million people to die in a famine. And North Korea actually HAS weapons of mass destruction, one of which they've already tested.
Oh, yes, but we've already fought in Korea.


China's human rights violations include torture, forced abortions, forced labor, detention of religious groups, government corruption and restrictions on speech and the media. Tibet has been a target for Chinese human rights violations. Thousands of Tibet citizens have been jailed, tortured and murdered for practicing their religion.

Last year, citizens were executed for such nonviolent crimes as bribery and stealing oil. China has a one-child policy which has led to the abandonment and killing of countless infants, especially females. Thousands of citizens are currently be detained in prisons for civil demonstration or trying to exercise a freedom of speech. These people are often held for long periods of time without access to legal counsel.

There is no religious freedom in China. By law, citizens are required to be atheist. Those who practice religion have been arrested, detained, placed under close police surveillance or internal exile, fined and, in some cases, tortured.
People are often arrested arbitrarily and placed under one of two forms of rehabilitation:

*1"reeducation through labor," under which police, without trial, can send individuals to labor camps for up to four years; and

2) "shelter and investigation," under which police can detain people without charge or trial for up to three months, a time limit that is routinely ignored.

Use of the death penalty is also random and has increased dramatically in the last few years. A person may be put to death for criminal offenses, including nonviolent property crimes such as theft, embezzlement and forgery.

China has instituted forced reproduction limitations and under the new law, certain categories of people still may be prevented from bearing children. There is forced sterilization and forced abortions.

I could go on. Why don't we do anything about the human rights violations in China? Because we need them for cheap labor so we can sell crap at Walmart!!


We want Iraq to become a democracy yet Saudi Arabia is not an electoral democracy. It's a religious dictatorship. The country is run by a dictator, King Abdullah. The country’s basic law declares that the Koran and the Sunna (the guidance set by the deeds and sayings of the prophet Muhammad) are the country’s constitution. All Saudis are required by law to be Muslims. The government prohibits the public practice of any religions other than Islam and restricts the religious practices of both the Shiite and Sufi Muslim minority sects. Families are allowed to execute other members who convert to other religions, particularly Christianity.

The government controls access to media and blocks internet websites that they deem offensive. (probably this one) Academic freedom is restricted in Saudi Arabia, and informers monitor classrooms for compliance with limits on curriculums, such as a ban on teaching Western philosophy and religions other than Islam. They arrest and detains political activists who stage civil demonstrations. Allegations of torture by police and prison officials are frequent.

The rights and treatment of women in Saudi Arabia is notorious. Women may not legally drive cars and their use of
public facilities is restricted when men are present.By law and custom, women cannot travel within or outside of the country without a male relative. The testimony of one man is equal to that of two women in Islamic law courts. Education is limited for women. If a woman divorces, she loses custody of her preteen children.

15 of the 19 airline hijackers in the attacks were Saudi citizens.
Osama bin Laden, leader of the terrorist group al-Qaeda, is from a wealthy Saudi family.

Why on earth do we tolerate the injustices and human rights violations in Saudi Arabia? Because, well, they have OIL! And lots of it. Saudi Arabia has the largest proven oil reserves in the world.

Other likely candidates:

Omar Al-Bashir, dictator of Sudan. According to the International Criminal Court, he is probably personally responsible for the genocide and violence in Darfur, in which 400,000 estimated people have died. He has been officially charged with masterminding the elimination of certain ethnic groups.
Robert Mugabe, dictator of Zimbabwe. Conditions in his country are so dismal that the life expectancy is 37 years of age. Peaceful assembly is frequently met with police in riot gear. People are also detained here for arbitrary "crimes" and tortured in prisons. We don't interfere with these dictatorships for the same reason we didn't interfere in Rwanda where 800,000 people were slaughtered with machetes: They're African. Enough said.




*http://www.christusrex.org/www1/sdc/hr_facts.html#Expressions

http://www.amnesty.org/

...but You Know Who You Are, (or maybe you don't...which makes it even sadder. )

I have a real pet peeve about email. I get email forwards all the time. Daily. In abundance. Mostly from people who otherwise don't write an email to say "boo" or "drop dead" or "how are ya?" I'm sure I'm not special in this circumstance. Most of what I get is basically propaganda of the right wing variety. Clearly, many of you are not paying attention. Perhaps I have not been clear on my political leanings. Or maybe I have been clear and it is these folks' intentions to steer me upon a path they deem more holy. Either way, it's not working for me. Nope. Not one bit.

I am 45 years old. I have 2 college degrees. I've lived and worked in many places and have met people from every facet imaginable. I know Christians, Jews, Pagans and Buddhists. I know people who are black, white and every color in between. I know hippies and white collar executives, doctors and lawyers. I've traveled many parts of the world. I've talked to a lot of people and listened to a variety of viewpoints ranging from socialized medicine to talking with angels. I've looked death in the face. I'm not a child. I'm not stupid and I'm not naive.
Let me try to clear up a few misconceptions about who I am and the delusions image you may have of me.

I am gay. I know there are whispers and "disapproval." It's old and tired. I make no apology. I owe no explanation. It's not a disease. I'm not mentally ill and it wasn't a choice. There is no argument. If you're not living my life, you have no say. I don't approve of a lot you've done either. It's a big reason I live on the west coast. No one cares. In fact, my relationship is supported and treated like anyone else's. It's refreshing not to have to defend myself. Yes, I will fight against anyone who wants to make me a second class citizen. Yes, I will talk to you about it if you'd like. No, I won't discuss my sex life. No, I don't find "fag" jokes funny.


I'm an avid loather of George W. Bush and his cronies. I have been since the turn of the century, when he stole the first election. The second time he was elected I actually looked into Canadian citizenship. It's just too damn cold there.

I have been against the war since it started. Please don't tell me that it's a "war against terrorism." Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11. It was the Saudis, the people that GWB is in bed with. He never intended to catch Osama bin Laden;he only wanted retaliation against Saddam Hussein over the Gulf War. Now we're in a quagmire for who know how long because the government doesn't want to "surrender." 4189 military have died so far. 160 of those are from self-inflicted injuries. Over 30,000 have been wounded. Meanwhile we've spent

...oh, I can't even keep up.

Oh and Vietnam? Still Communist

All I hear is whining about how "democrats are going to raise our taxes...." Um, helloooo? Where do you think the money for this war comes from?
Seriously, I don't want to hear it. That's the only argument I hear. Oh, and people complaining about those godless liberals who want to legalize gay marriage and abort babies. I ask myself why these are even political issues. Funny how some people think the only people who know God are those who tote guns and support war, all the things that are the extreme antithesis of Christ taught. Hypocrites. I have no use for them.

And this crap about Obama being a Muslim terrorist is weak. If you want to dissect the names of political candidates, let's take a look at the name MCCAIN.
"Mc" is an Irish prefix meaning "son of"
Cain was Abel's brother who murdered him. Cain was the first murderer.
McCain means "son of the first murderer."
Oh, but that's ridiculous, right?
Riiiiight
But the fact is McCain will be a killer because he wants to keep this war going until we "win." He's killing brothers, fathers, sons, daughter, mothers, and sisters every day.
How will we know when we "win"? When Iraq has a "democracy"? The real war is a civil war with the Sunnis and the Shiites that has been going on for 7000 years. I suspect that McCain will keep us there for that long.

OK, I'm against the war. Get it?

I support the troops. I support the bringing of them home. And, my fear is that they will reinstate a draft and I have a 15 year old nephew that I'm not thrilled about being dragged into this war...or any other, for that matter. I don't know.


Another thing: Don't tell me to go pick something up at Walmart. Walmart is a monster hellbent on destroying free enterprise.
If you need a more visual explanation, I give you my dear friend, Henry:
Why Walmart is Evil


If you're pissed off by reading this post, you may be the one.

I can't believe it's Halloween already.
A couple of days ago I was in the backyard, wearing my big old Ugg boots, with the dogs for their morning elimination. I was focused on herding Cody up the stairs. He's deaf, old and slower than ever. He's become a skinny flatulent old man. Probably the ass cancer isn't helping. Anyway, I caught my boot on the edge of a concrete slab and landed *SMACK* right onto my face. No warning. No breaking of the fall. Just BAM. Actually, my face came to a skid along the concrete, scratched a deep gouge in my glasses and sheered off part of nose and upper lip. Yeah, it's beautiful now. Just in time for the holiday. I don't even need a mask. And somehow I also hit my knee. I was distracted, at first, by the blood dripping off my face to notice it until an hour later my knee swelled up the size of a softball, filling with fluid. In short, I'm a mess.

Cody did quite well at the beach last week in spite of his ever-growing ass cancer.

I'm all wet because I had to rescue my goofball dog from the rocks. He thinks he can climb.



Another geocache, at the beach.

While I've been housebound, I worked on my website. Check it out: www.marchmoon.net

I headed out today with the dogs to do some geocaching in Galice and Merlin, close to the wild and scenic area of the Rogue River.
I came across this "nano" cache in a drain pipe. Very challenging to one's digital dexterity.

I worked hard for this one!
Where is it????


The wild and scenic Rogue River.

Myself, right before I tumbled into the Rogue River.

I came across this log just lying on the ground. It appears to have a bullet stuck inside.

Actually, just a tiny cache with an even smaller log.

We came across this lovely creature while we were out and about yesterday. He was apparently dressed for a birthday party. I doubt he was having that good of a time, in spite of his festive attire.


Went to see Religulous last night, the Bill Maher documentary on religion. Pretty much said what I've been thinking for a while. It may be offensive to 88% of the country.

Oh, and if I ever hear the word "Maverick" again as long as I live, I may barf.
I just can't think of James Garner the same way.




I've been asked to clear up a few things about geocaching.
What is it?
It's a worldwide game. People involved in it sign up with a website, usually geocaching.com, create a username, and then use the site to find hidden "caches." Caches are containers that hold a small book or paper log. Some caches contain small trade items, such as toys, trinkets, charms, coins. Usually the items are not valuable so it's not like we're out looking for a million dollars. Like I said, it's a game. People come up with ingenious ways to hide things.


Can you spot the cache in this tree? It's a camo envelope and it's bungeed to the branch. When you find a cache, you sign the log with your user name and date. Sometimes there are special trinkets for "First to Find" AKA FTF. Some caches contain "travel bugs" or Geocoins, which are trackable by way of a number attached to them. People put them out there in hopes that they will travel to a particular destination. They can track their progress online.
Anyway, it's a fun way to get out and about, explore areas, and find new places you didn't know existed. And the dogs love it. Now I want to cash in my burrs.

Did you think I'd died? Where did the summer go?
We finally got the house painted.

From Home

Yes, we chose RED! We love it and the neighbors love it. Now all we need is some gutters.

From Girls On Blue

Myself, KC, and my dad.
A few weeks ago I rode the motorcycle to Jackson Hole, WY to meet my parents who were in Sturgis for the week. We spent some time together riding through Yellowstone and into Montana. I took a work buddy of mine who'd never been on a bike before so I dragged her along for 2700 miles of heat, cold, rain, hail and marvelously curvy roads and beautiful scenery. I think she wants to get her own bike now. M wasn't able to go because of some family obligations. Her parents just moved to the Rogue Valley from Orange Co, CA.

My other excitement is that I have discovered geocaching. I got a cheapy GPS and have been buzzing all over, finding caches all over the area. <a href="http://marchmoongeocache.blogspot.com/">My Geocaching Blog</a> If any of you are into this, let me know.
It would be fun to send stuff across the country from cache to cache.

Isn't my hair great? That is some serious hair product that lasts this long, no?

I am alive, but not so well. I am, actually, feeling like a huge sack of mucoid hacking crap. Also, someone has apparently beaten me with a club and shoved burning pokers into my sinuses. I sleep a lot, which is good, but I'm hating this now. I want to wake up and be well. I am starting to give up hope of ever feeling better. After working my weekend, I came home and have contracted some sort of disgusting flu and have been bed/couch bound since Tuesday.
"Who gets the flu in June??" Monica wants to know.

So, I have to say that I've missed everyone's birthday and probably father's day. I haven't really forgotten. I've just been way-layed. So, I'm a lousy aunt, daughter, cousin and friend. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

I thought I should arise and let you know that I am still here. Monica made me some brownies to help to make me feel better. As hard as I tried, I was unable to dissect this long hair from one of the brownies:


Oh, the joys of mammalianism.

I am very unhappy about this illness because 1)I'm off work 2) the weather has turned fabulous and 3) I'm afraid I may miss the event I've been waiting to go to all year.

Our biggest life obstacle these days is deciding what color to paint the house. We have gone through pretty close to every color of the spectrum and the garage door now looks like some drunken grandmother's quilt. Right now, the house is Gray, so any color will be an improvement.

Stay well!

I must announce that I am alive. My primary purpose online lately has been maintaining a new website called PlanetAshland.net

Last week we decided to take a drive up the coast and visit the places we missed on our motorcycle trip a couple of years ago. Our first night we returned to one of our favorite hotels called the Ya Tel in Yachats, OR. Yachats is a quaint seaside town which has not been overrun with commercialism. It was exciting to walk out on the jetty and watch the waves crash around us at dusk. Afterward we went to the Drift Inn and had dinner. The place was artistically decorated with colorful umbrellas and mermaid murals all over the walls. We were happy to have live music while we ate fresh seafood. June Rushing overwhelmed us with her rendition of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah."

Nothing makes me happier than coffee in the morning on the beach.

Turns out there was a heatwave coming through Ashland which made the coast even warmer than usual. Sometimes in the high 90's. I don't think I've ever seen it that warm on the west coast, at least where I've been hanging out. After reluctantly leaving Yachats, we drove up the coast and visted a few other seaside towns. We had visited Newport on our way back from Canada in '06 and found the harbor area, an Uber-Ripley's Believe it or Not and pulled taffy turista town. Then Monica discovered the opposite side of town called Nye Beach, which runs along the ocean. We stopped in an arts center where we learned that the area's school art program was shutting down due to lack of funds. As we walked around and looked at all the amazing student art we were pretty disheartened to hear about another program closing. It seems that art and music are the first to go in schools. The curator of the art center told us to check out the Sylvia Beach Hotel just up the street.

We were welcomed to explore the rooms of the hotel, each one had a theme of a famous author. The whole hotel was dedicated to the love of books. Rooms that were available were named after authors such as Hemingway, Colette, Alice Walker, Dr. Seuss, Virginia Woolf, Jane Austen, JRR Tolkein and Agatha Christie. They even had dorm room dedicate to Oregon authors so people could stay relatively cheaply.

After we left Nye Beach, we drove up a little further and decided to have a picnic along the water. It was so windy we had to hold our food down.

I tried to enjoy lunch with the Unibomber.

Monica had the idea to go along the cape route as we went further north so we could stay along the water. We decided to try to find a place in Oceanside. She spotted a hand-painted sign along the road that said Clifftop Inn. "There's a place!" she said. I'm always a little skeptical of Monica's scouting because she points out every single thing along the road as potential. As we rolled into the tiny town we found very few places to stay. I thought I would check out this Clifftop, thinking it would be a bust. We drove up a long hill to the peak of the cliff where a simple looking hotel stood. Monica went in and as I studied the surroundings and the view I figured it was out of our price range. She came out of the office, beaming. She had managed to negotiate a lower price since it was so late in the evening. We scored an amazing room with a deck overlooking the ocean.

We sat out, drank wine and watched the beautiful sunset.

By the time it grew dark, we realized we were starving. Finding food in this tiny town was nearly impossible and we ended up at a tavern just up the road. Smoky and decorated with the original paneling and a few animal heads, we walked up to the bar and peered into the kitchen. We heard someone cooking so we thought we were in luck. It was going to be a far cry from the dinner we had in Yachats, but it was worth it having seen that sunset. A short gray haired woman with a cigarette ambled out of the kitchen. She was wearing one of those cheap boardwalk T-shirts with a picture of a teddy bear ironed on. She seated us in a corner booth away from the smoking drunk women at the end of the bar. The menu consisted of ordinary burgers, sandwiches and other fried delights. I ordered a cheeseburger. We chuckled when they offered us TaterTots as an optional side. Classy. Monica ordered the Garden Burger. "Do you have a wheat bun?" she inquired. I kicked her under the table. "Hello? They serve TATER TOTS." Wheat bun indeed. Of course, to go with your minced, formed deep-fried potato products. Dork.

After our succulent pub grub, we returned to our room. All night long the balmy breeze fluttered through the room and the sound of the crashing waves lulled us to sleep. It was amazing. Turns out the place is being renovated into a retreat center. Secretly, I hope it stays as quaint as it is. I thanked the woman, a hemp-wearing soft-spoken 20-something, who gave us the room. I'm pretty sure it was the best room. At least to me.

We literally had to pull ourselves away from that place. When we woke up it was really windy and we were so glad we weren't on the motorcycle. We bypassed Tillamook since we heard it was a boring lumber town. It is also the home of Tillamook cheeses which makes it quite aromatic with bovine flatulence. We rode up the coast toward Astoria and stopped to see one of the lighthouses where both got dizzy on the spiral staircase. Wimps.
We stopped to visit the landing site of Lewis and Clark and then we crossed the bridge from Astoria into Washington and stayed in Long Beach. Being a Friday night, our accomodations diminished greatly. We ended up at a Rodeway Inn. It was close to the beach and we had a nice walk along the beach at sunset. We had dinner at a seafood place where the specialty was fresh halibut. A seafood dish is always pricey so we split a dish of grilled halibut and the more I ate of it I realized it had no flavor whatsoever. It was one of the most bland things I've ever eaten. I didn't say anything and thought well, it's just really fresh so it has no fishy taste. I ate it with the rice pilaf which didn't have much flavor either. After we were finished Monica asked me how I liked it and I confessed I thought it didn't have much flavor. She agreed and when she went to pay the bill and she was gone for a long time. The lady at the cashier asked her how she liked the dinner and Monica told her that it was a bit tasteless. Evidently, the cook failed to season the fish and we got the fish for free with apologies. We felt a little better about that. Thank god Monica is willing to complain because I'm such a pushover.

Before heading south we stopped to take a short hike to the Cape Disappointment light house. It was a nice walk through the woods along the coast until it became a concrete uphill slab associated with the Coast Guard. Afterward, we headed toward Portland where we spend a few hours at the Saturday Market under the Burnside Bridge. It was really hot, but we wandered around through the crowds and then went to Powell's Books where we usually can both easily spend a few hours. I stood in the metaphysical section and listened to a couple argue over the buying of books. "Well, did you read the last one you bought?" the woman snipped at her husband. She was scolding him for buying books and he was just taking this berating from her. I glanced over my shoulder to see if she was actually wearing his testicles as earrings. Good god, people, get out of here and go to the library and fight. I digress. She made me feel so guilty that I didn't buy anything either. I told you I was a pushover.

After a stop in Eugene for a Trader Joe's run, we got home about 10:30pm. It's still been pretty hot until today when it started to rain.

And now, for the slideshow:

Hooray! The gray wolf is no longer on the Federal Protection list for endangered species. What can that mean? Well, we can go out and kill them again!

Idaho, Montana and Wyoming have already developed plans for hunts. So, if you've been hankering for some good tasty wolf steaks--after all, hunters always eat what they hunt, right?--get yourself up to one of these fine states and sign up for the next murdering rampage hunt.

Hmm, I did a search for Wolf recipes and I didn't come up with much. I found this one:

WOLF CHILI PIE

4 c. corn chips 2/3 c. chopped onion 1 1/2 c. shredded Colby or cheddar cheese 19 oz. can Wolf brand chili without beans Layer 2 1/2 cups of corn chips, onion, 3/4 cup cheese and chili in a 1 1/2 quart casserole. Top with remaining corn chips. Bake in preheated moderate oven (375 degrees) about 25 minutes. Top with remaining cheese and continue baking 5 minutes. Garnish with sour cream and ripe olives (optional).

But, strangely, it contains no wolf meat.

So if anyone has any recipes for wolf, I'd be happy to post them.

Be a man; kill a wolf. Get them back on the endangered list.

Tit Searchers Anonymous?
Woman forced to remove nipple rings in airport security.

The woman involved -- Mandi Hamlin -- told reporters earlier Friday she was humiliated by last month's incident, in which she was forced to painfully remove the piercings behind a curtain as she heard snickers from male TSA officers nearby. The incident occurred at the Lubbock, Texas, airport.

Well, guess who has a just a little too much power? This is why it takes so long to get through airport security. The idiots are busy tormenting people to remove their body piercings and searching baby diapers (yes, this actually happened to a friend of mine) because, I guess, they are soooo dangerous on a plane. Nipple rings. Breast feeding. On a plane? What is the world coming to?

Mom kicked off plane for breast feeding her baby.
Are you kidding me with this? What is the issue that people have about breast-feeding? Let's break it down very simply, shall we?
We are mammals. Mammals, by definition--(Thank you, National Geographic): Any of various warm-blooded vertebrate animals of the class Mammalia, including humans, characterized by a covering of hair on the skin and, in the female, milk-producing mammary glands for nourishing the young.

Oh, my god, what are these bunnies doing????

And this orangatan??

And the worst of all, this shameless mother panda. Good lord, is that a breast???

I know, we shouldn't stoop to this animalistic behavior. After all, who would support the 3 million dollar a year salary of Nestle, maker of baby formula? Do you think the CEO wants you to use free healthy, natural breast milk for your baby? Barbaric. No, we are more civilized than this. We humans want it known that breasts are SEX OBJECTS and should be treated solely as such. Yep, we know the real reason for breasts: For adolescent fun and mockery, of course.

Feeding babies? Ridiculous and repulsive.

Someone rescue me.

Sorry I've been a bit lax on my comments. It's been so nice out, I hate to be inside. I'm on my 40hr work stretch this weekend, but I hope to sneak a few peeks onto LJ. Have a great weekend!

Today would have been my grandmother's 96th birthday. Sadly, she died 40 years ago at age 56 from metastatic breast cancer. I was five, but I remember quite a bit about her. I remember her making donuts: chocolate and lemon. She's probably responsible for my coffee addiction because she used to make me "baby coffee," primarily milk and sugar, tinted with coffee. Once I was in her room while she was changing her clothes and I saw a scar between her chest and shoulder. I asked her about it and she explained that when she was 11 a man in her neighborhood was cleaning his gun and it went off while she was standing on a sidewalk and hit her in the shoulder. I recall being horrified that someone had shot my grandmother.

She was pretty progressive for her time. When my mom got pregnant with me she told my father he didn't have to marry my mother because pregnancy was a stupid reason to get married. People should marry because they want to be together. She had raised my mom and uncle by herself when my grandfather walked out on them when my mom was four. My father returned to his hometown for a while, but returned to marry my mother because he wanted to. I sometimes wonder how life would have been if I'd been raised by my grandmother without my father around.

Most of all, I learned the word cancer at an early age. It's the monster that robbed us of these last 40 years that I wish my grandmother could have been with us. I would like to think she'd be proud of me now. Deep down--or not so deep down--I've always felt she's been a presence in my life, possibly keeping me from being killed a few times, and generally watching over me. I know that whereever she is she's no longer in pain. Pain was everpresent for her, but the only way you knew it was the presence of Anacin bottles and the smell of Ben-Gay. She believed she was fighting arthritis when, in fact, she was losing a battle against bone cancer. I know she's happy and whole now.

Last night Monica surprised me with tickets to see the OSF's Midsummer Night's Dream. I had wanted to see it, but had no idea I'd be seeing it so soon. We had excellent seats, 5th row middle and the play was hilarious, campy, and entertaining. The "fairies" seemed so familiar to me for some reason. I swear the director of this play has been to the same gay bars I went to in the early 90's.



Monica is pretty sure that the Shakespeare purists are going to have a big fat stroke over this production, but the audience seemed to enjoy it immensely. I think Shakespeare would be pleased.